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Accounts like Tindernightmares, detailing the most horrific pickup lines, and Bye Felipe, which calls out men who turn hostile when rejected, don’t have millions of followers for nothing: They are snapshots of what it is to be a woman swiping online, for whom harassment is a rite of passage.
There are men who won’t swipe a woman above a certain age (often 29), unrequested crotch shots, that notorious OKCupid report about racial preferences and all sorts of other depressingly archaic behaviors, as detailed in pop psychology studies and books like “Dataclysm,” by Christian Rudder, the founder of OKCupid.
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“It strikes me as just another thing that we as women have to do,” Meredith Fineman, a digital strategist in Washington, said with some weariness.Wolfe, in which women must make the first move, nudity is verboten and kindness is part of the company mission.If you are the millennial version of a Sensitive New Age Guy, to quote Christine Lavin — or a woman who wants to date one — you’re on Bumble. Wolfe, a founder of the better-known rival dating app Tinder, which was the subject of a damning Vanity Fair article suggesting that it promotes hookup culture disadvantageous to women, left the company in a tangled manner stemming from her relationship and subsequent breakup with another founder, Justin Mateen.And if you’re one of those people who still subscribes to “The Rules: Time-Tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr.Right,” the 1995 self-help book that advised women to act elusive and demure, wait for the guy to make the first move and thus end up with a wedding ring, Bumble may seem radical.
“A lot of contemporary dating, a lot of the kind of sense of unease,” Ms.